Reiki for Dementia

Christian Stone | Standing Stones Healing Co.

Can you offer Reiki to someone with dementia? My sister has dementia, and she can't give permission. Don't I need her permission?

Thank you for this important question. First, I'm sending lots of blessings and best wishes to you and your sister, as dementia is a challenging and awful disease for everyone involved. 

Of course, Reiki will do no harm, which means that the question of permission is really one of ethics. We all have our own personal moral system, so practitioners often have different views on this question. I was taught to get permission for sending/offering Reiki and make it a standard practice to seek permission.

At the same time, we usually don't ask our sister if we can give her a hug or lovingly place our hands on her. Putting an arm around a loved one while intentionally sending love is something we all do, Reiki or not. Some practitioners suggest asking her higher self for permission. Yes, you can ask her higher self for permission, but what's the difference between offering Reiki and offering love in this instance? Probably not much.

If you are going to offer a whole session with all hand positions and etc., I would personally let her know and make sure it's ok. I would approach it in this way: "Sis"... Well, I call my sister "babe," so if this was my sister, I'd say, "Babe, I'm going to offer you Reiki. I'm going to lightly place my hands around your body in love. Ok?"

Even when someone has dementia to the point of having no idea who we are or what we're doing and can't give consent, it's a sign of love, compassion, and respect to let them know we're going to do something to them. So even if you can't get her permission and your sister no longer has the ability to give consent, I still encourage explaining to her what you're going to do...and to then pay attention to her reactions and stop if at any point she seems uncomfortable or upset.

This is the same kind of question that can come up anytime someone is unable to give consent, whether they're suffering from dementia, Alzheimer's, or are in a coma. In these instances, it's important to consider our relationship with the person and how they might feel if they could give consent. Reiki will not harm them or their condition, but if we know the person wouldn't give consent to receiving Reiki if they could, then I encourage considering simply being with that person, holding their hand, and sending love, while of course always letting them know what we're doing, no matter what their mental capacity is. 

Remember, we all have our own personal moral system, and in my moral system, it is absolutely ok to offer your sister Reiki. Sending blessings to your relationship with your sister!